Why True Sci-Fi Movies are Rare

I had intended to write about how good sci-fi movies are hard to come by but instead I found an excerpt from an Isaac Asimov essay that I think says it best…

“ […] Eye-sci-fi has an audience that is fundamentally different from that of science fiction. In order for eye-sci-fi to be profitable it must be seen by tens of millions of people; in order for science fiction to be profitable it need be read by only tens of thousands of people. This means that some ninety percent (perhaps as much as ninety-nine percent) of the people who go to see eye-sci-fi are likely never to have read science fiction.

The purveyors of eye-sci-fi cannot assume that their audience knows anything about science, has any experience with the scientific imagination, or even has any interest in science fiction.

But, in that case, why should the purveyors of eye-sci-fi expect anyone to see the pictures? Because they intend to supply something that has no essential connection with science fiction, but that tens of millions of people are willing to pay money to see. What is that? Why, scenes of destruction.

You can have spaceships destroying spaceships, monsters destroying cities, comets destroying the Earth. These are called ‘special effects’ and it is what people go for. A piece of eye-sci-fi without destruction is, I think, almost unheard of. If such a thing were made, no one would go to see it; or, if it were so good that it would indeed pull a small audience, it would not be thought of as science fiction of any kind.”

Another Guitar Video – “Clapton Shreds”

This is another video where the audio has been replaced. Again, I find it hillarious. Unlike the others, the drums, keyboard, and saxaphone have been replaced along with the guitar.

Eddie Van Halen Overdub

This is friggin HILLARIOUS…

The Steve Vai one is also funny. Click below…
http://youtube.com/watch?v=wsXS5fCq4LU

Outsourcing Customer Support Sucks

This is a transcription of my customer service request to a leading software testing tool company…

(Product details have been omitted)

Me :
Need Physical Media – Product X

I have requested physical media for Product X multiple times and still
not received the CDs. Could you please mail me the physical media to
the address included in my Support profile?

Them :
Hi Matt,

I am going to reassign this issue to License team and they will assist you regarding the Product X License.

Me:
Just to clarify, I don’t need a license, I just need physical media.

Thanks,

Matt

Them:
Hello Matt,

I found your SR’s with your upgrade requests for Product Y. I can not ship Cd’s, they are shipped from overseas. I can send links. Please resond to your SR’s for your CD shipments.

*Note : They’re pointing me to the service request I opened to get CDs for a different product.

Them:
Hello Matt,

Here are the download links for Product X. If you need the physical CD, please login to support and click on the “submit upgrade request” link on the right hand side, as physical shipment requests are handled overseas now.

*Note: The reason I opened the service request in the first place is because the “Submit Upgrade Request” link didn’t get me any CDs.

Me:
Thanks for the download link. I have downloaded and installed Product X. However, I still need physical media. I have requested the physical media several times using the method you described with no success. Please look into this.

Them:
Hello Matt,

These are your SR’s for your CD’s. I will send a email to the person that ships these and see if he can get to these sooner.

*Note : At this point they’re pointing me to the service request I opened to get CDs for a different product, AGAIN.

Me:
I don’t need Product Y disks. I need Product X. I don’t understand why this is so difficult. I just received 2 Product Y, and it is not what I requested. I need Product X media.

Thanks,

Matt

Them:
Hello Matt,

I found your CD request for Product Y. Alex replied to you with the links and stated if you needed CD’s to reply back. I don’t see a reply from you. I can send an email to have him send the CD’s to you as soon as possible. Unfortunately I can not ship CD’s from this location they are now shipped overseas.

*Note: AGAIN, they are talking about a different Service Request where I asked for Product Y CDs. I’m trying to get Product X CDs in this request.

Me:
The title of the ticket is “Need PHYSICAL MEDIA.” I wasn’t asking for the download links in the first place. Please read the entirety of this service request. ( I asked for physical media and the service representative thought I needed licenses. I corrected the Service Representative, and then received download links for Product Y, which isn’t what I requested. I then got download links for Product X, and was instructed to use the “Submit Upgrade Request” form. The whole reason I opened the request is because I’ve tried the “Submit Upgrade Request” form multiple times and have never received the CDs I requested.) If I can’t get CDs by using the online form (which I’ve tried several times) and you can’t send me CDs, how am I supposed to get them?

Isn’t this INSANE?!

Windows Vista Instructions

I could be crazy, but I think this is an indication as to how good the operating system must be : Windows Help

Online Reviews – Not Support

Hear ye, hear ye!

The product review section of online stores is not for asking your support questions!

I always love it when I see entries like :

“4 stars, a great product!”
“2 stars, I didn’t like it.”
“I can’t get it to work, has anybody seen this error before?”

Way to go Einstein. Yeah, I’d think that a link labeled “Reviews” actually means “Ask your dumb question here when you should actually RTFM” too. 😉

Superman II – Richard Donner Directors Cut

My brother let me borrow his copy of the recently released Superman II Richard Donner Director’s Cut DVD. As a kid, I loved Superman II. What kid wouldn’t like 3 super villians fighting Superman? As an adult, the theatrical release of the movie is almost unwatchable.

Here’s a little back-story for you : You see Superman I and II were filmed simultaneously as Richard Donner as the director. The Superman project ran into some schedule and budget problems though, so at one point Superman II production was put on hold to ensure that Superman would be completed at a more acceptable time frame, and budget. When Superman I was released, and was a hit, Superman II was revived, but not with Richard Donner. The producers of Superman I and II, the Salkinds, had a falling out with Richard during the completion of Superman I, so the Salkinds brought in a different director for Superman II. Because of this change, the feel of Superman II took a campy turn. (As did all the remaining Superman sequels.) There was a large amount of footage that Richard Donner shot for Superman II (almost a whole movie’s worth) that never saw the light of day because the new director had his own vision for the film.

The Richard Donner version of the film, is a MUCH BETTER MOVIE. Gone are the campy squeeks and whimpers of Non, the large bafoon villain. Gone is the lame bystander dialog during the Metropolis fight scene between Superman, and the Super Villains. (In the original version at some point Superman is knocked into someone’s wind sheild and the person inside the car states “he’ll pay for it!”) Gone are the lame sight gags during the fight scene including someone getting an ice cream cone in the face, a man’s toupee being blown off, and a guy on roller skates wearing a sequin vest being blown down the street.

The most important change, in my opinion, in the Richard Donner version is the removal of the horrible fight scene in Superman’s fortress of solitude. In the original version, Superman and his enemies mysteriously gain powers that Superman has never had, like the ability to shoot beams from their fingers, teleport, and in Supermans case throw a Suran Wrap “S” at his enemies to disable them. This horrid scene is gone in the Donner Cut.

As a whole, the Donner cut is a more serious movie. It’s more consistent with Superman I in regard to “feel.” If you liked Superman II as a kid, but can’t sit through it as an adult, I highly recommend you check out the Richard Donner cut of the movie. It’s much better.